[Editor’s Note 7/25/22: Upon examination of further evidence on the matter, it appears I initially got the timeline placement wrong. The title of this post has now been edited with the correct number, 63.5; I have kept the error in the body text below to avoid acting like I never make mistakes, & because minitruthing is double plus ungood.]
Another new content announcement: Destin Daniel Cretton, fresh off his success with Shang-Chi, is developing a Wonder Man series.
And now, part 65….
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness:
–Meanwhile in some kind of Subspace Emissary patchwork existence, Strange looks *really* different.
–America Chavez is in this movie, but it’s a crossover, not her solo work, so I don’t have to worry about Gabby Rivera’s craptacular dialogue.
–Yeah, ties are nonsense.
–That guy inching away from Strange so West can sit next to him is hilarious.
–West, he literally looked at 14 million outcomes & only found 1 victory. Cope, you bitter jerk.
–If you can’t go to your ex’s wedding without declaring love for her after the ceremony, then don’t go. At least he’s not being bitter like Nick.
—Strange plays Kirby.
–Narokath Redgormor Ulyaoth.
–Did that thing just trumpet like an elephant?
—My brain when I see a green fireball.
–Star stomp.
–Pop.
–Wong’s little wiggle of his own “slingie” was priceless.
–Where did the movie’s built-in subtitles go? I don’t like when those go away. Caption the Spanish instead.
–It means dreams *can be* a window into other lives, not that they *must be*.
–Dat Devil’s Interval tho. She’s definitely dreaming. This makes a good easter-egg reference to WandaVision, but it still makes sense so far without the show.
–“The Darkhold only showed me the truth” is almost verbatim what everyone who used it on AoS said.
–This wasn’t the justification he used for giving Thanos the Time Stone. It was the justification he used for letting Tony Stark die.
–That’s a Raimi scene transition.
–Where did this minotaur guy come from?
–Where did the movie’s built-in subtitles go? I don’t like when those go away. Caption the Chinese instead.
–It is nowhere near sundown, Wanda; you’re early.
–Those are some disturbingly charred corpses.
–Mirror dimension trap FTW.
–Oof, her fingers are crisping just like Agatha’s.
–I call shenanigans on the gong; it’s not reflective at all! Creepy entrance, though.
–“What happens to their mother?” is exactly the right question.
–Universe montage! I see: normal, big floating tribunal heads, Galeem, Shifting Sand Land, Fortress of Solitude, BEES, Aquitar, normal, a literal ad for Evil Dead’s distributor, Pipe Land, a big pile of bones, Jurassic Park, Toon Town, some kind of bombed-out ruin, cubism, Splatoon, old-timey noir, M.C. Escher’s brain, futuristic noir, Bag O’ Glass, & Mustafar.
–Hi, Bruce!
–The Utopian Parallel, a world outside of the universe. America’s two moms are both biological.
–Sure would’ve been nice for us to SEE some of main-universe Mordo trying to kill Strange.
–Is Mordo casting an ominous-atmosphere spell?
–Nice “What was in that tea?” callback.
–Raimi cam! This is some massive Evil Dead vibes right here.
–This is massively authentic little-kids-making-up-a-song-with-no-prep. Nice touch.
–Ok, Wanda, you know Wong didn’t do it.
–She brought them back to life just to kill them again, dang.
–A copy? So there could be more than 1 Darkhold per universe.
–“Mount Wundagore” sounds like it belongs in that cartoon universe.
–I hate that they’re calling MCU-Prime “616”. Like, I get if they want the film multiverse to be completely separate from the print multiverse, but this retroactively makes 14 years’ worth of discourse on the topic more confusing, unless Disney’s got somebody going through ALL of the internet editing every mention of “616” to include the word “comic” for clarity. There are so many unused numbers they could’ve picked instead.
—Baxter Foundation?
–WHY ULTRON BOTS!?
–Wanda complains about not getting portaled all the way, but she was able to just fly over the rough part anyway.
–This clearly isn’t the same Captain Carter from What If; she was in a very different position when we last saw her.
–Raise your hand if you ever expected to see even a VARIANT of Black Bolt again. (*keeps hand down*)
–In this universe, Mar-Vell flew with Maria rather than with Carol.
–Jimmy Woo!?
–There actually was a 60s band called the Fantastic Four.
–I know that theme song….but why “97”, Caption Guy?
–Tether recoveries suck.
–The sugar coma is real.
–Get out of my head, Charles!
–oh look it’s exactly what Strange warned you about whoever could have predicted this threat
–Mordo, I’m gonna trust the telepath when it comes to whose intentions are true.
–“There will be someone left to raise them” is such a cold-blooded line.
–Pop.
–Pop. We’re really pushing the limits of PG-13 here.
–I just never realized until just this moment how easy it is to cut someone in half with a machete shield.
–How did Maria get depowered here?
–Strange was always a more creative thinker than Mordo.
–Another star strike.
–I love that Xavier’s mental image of himself can always walk.
—Brain death.
–Nice patch job on the cloak. Could’ve at least tried for the same color?
–Wanda’s Die-Harding it out here.
–Jump-scare warning.
–Meanwhile in some kind of Subspace Emissary patchwork existence, Strange forgot to CLOSE THE DOOR BEHIND HIMSELF.
–The much-hyped Book of Vishanti did literally nothing, just like Captain Phasma.
–Proof that Wanda could actually get EVERYTHING she wants WITHOUT killing America.
–Strange gets a bit of George Bailey’s backstory.
–It’s not his Christine, dude, in any sense of the word.
—Music battle!
–I hate spike-top fences.
–Forget “how is Wong alive;” the more pertinent question is “how did his magic rope stay active while he was unconscious?”
–The camerawork, the voiceover work, the music, Zombie Strange looks exactly like a deadite….Sam Raimi took Marvel’s money & made Evil Dead 4.
–America’s only problem was that her focus was all brokus.
–Captions: “Dead Strange“
–Wanda is more forgiving of Wanda than even Wanda herself is. RIP…?
–No more Darkholds at all anywhere, nice.
–I think Wong’s comments about happiness are really important. We might not have everything we want, but we can still enjoy what we do have. And of course, that’s not to say we should never fight for more, but rather that we need to weigh the costs.
–Not wearing a watch that could constantly cut you with broken glass shards. Good life lesson learned, Stephen.
–I want something else to get me through this semi-charmed kind of life.
–Mid-credits scene: Well, he got over that pretty quickly. Wait, who’s this Dark Dimension lady? It’d be nice if they said her name somewhere other than the captions that most people won’t turn on. (And the same goes for minotaur guy.)
–Credits: The ice cream song got a composer credit.
–Post-credits scene: It’s over!
Executive summary: Such a weird & amazing movie. Definitely better than the first one. A lot of bold choices. Enrapturing performances by Cumberbatch & Olsen.
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